Blood Pressure
I crane my neck back as far as it will go,
Like it’s on a hinge and
Needs oiling.
I walk under the falling autumn leaves
My blue eyes parallel with the
Bluer sky and
Pretend I’m being rolled around on a hospital bed,
And how beautiful that would be, to just
Look up, see the
Vast cloudy blanket through the orange interference,
To breathe nature’s briskness deep deep inside.
And to feel, right next to my bedside,
The other half of me.
The predominant side of my heart, the side
Not concerned with the menial job of
Keeping me alive.
The real side, the majority half,
That splats love through my veins where
Blood should be, rapids and wave machines and
Fire hoses of red hot Love.
The dream or premonition or moment
Fades quickly, too quickly,
Whilst I try to flesh it out
To keep it
Bright in my minds eye.
Even fuzzy, even uncertain,
But there is
Nothing there. There is
No one there.
I long to see fireworks reflect in your eyeballs
I long to feel a warm hand lobster claw onto mine
I long to hear the comfortable silence flood over us
I long to lock eyes with you across a crowded room
I long to know what to say
I long to know what you’re going to say
I long to make dinner for two
I long to weep with laughter
I long to feel skin on my skin
I long to find you
I long to love you
I long to feel not so very alone.